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this entry may only be significant to, umm, two of you or so, but i just had the weirdest experience.

i slept (yay me) for the first time. from about 7:30 til about 12:40. And then i woke up hungry. So i decided, okay, not a problem, i'll eat something. While my food was heating up i turned on the food network. On this show, they were talking about degrees in Food Studies - not food science (like nutrition) or culinary arts - but food studied for it's anthropological, economical, and other -ical impacts. So I'm zoning, and waiting for the microwave to beep, when they flash on to someone from BU saying how much she loves it and they go back to her later on and there she's talking about how she wants to write a middle eastern cookbook, and then she said something else. I wasn't really listening because i was still in shock.

And this is the part that is only significant to a few of you - the reason i was in shock was that the name of that woman speaking was Charissa Melnik - and be damned if it didn't look just like Charissa from good ol' deerfield. I think it might have actually been her.


I'm going to lock down this entry. I'm going to lock down this entry so you two cannot continue to communicate via my livejournal, instead of you two continuing to think this is in any way an appropriate place to do this, but just in case, Charissa, you were wondering who i am - allow me to tell you.

My name is Casey and you probably have no clue who I am because I wasn't really meaningful in anyway to your life. While I was probably nothing more than dirt under your shoe, allow me to inform you that you, Charissa, made an indelible impression upon me.

Want to know how you managed that? Oh, go on, of course you do. Keep reading.

You made such a fabulous impression upon me, Charissa, by tormenting me in seventh grade when you were in the eighth. When I was in seventh, had just started at frontier from a different school district and knew absolutely no one, you took it upon yourself with your friends to harrass me at lunch and outside of lunch until finally i spent three quarters of the year hiding in the girls locker room as often as possible and not eating because it wasn't worth it.

You, Charissa, and your friends who had no idea who I was except that I happened to make friends with Deirdre (and Kate - who was new also by the way and thus you had no prior impression of her) booted us from lunch tables, threatened us, and actually while you did not, some of your friends used to throw rocks at me while I was in gym class.

You made me cry. You made me hurt. You made me scared. You made me angry. You did what every classic bitch of a popular junior high group of people do to those they consider worthy targets but not human beings.

So when you comment that you don't know who I am, I'm not surprised. To you - I'm sure I was nothing. But as to me - you were and remain part of my life that drove me to debating hurting myself on a regular basis, that made me question who i was at every step of my first year of junior high. You were part of the biggest group of bullies who I ever had the horror of coming across. That's who you were.

I'm keeping this post open long enough for you to check back and read this and then i'll be locking it. I have turned off comments so you can find other ways to communicate with your buddies.

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